It Wasn't a Good Day to Wear Mascara....

I really did try.

And Prednisone has a way of making you feel good. It’s just a cover. Nevertheless, I felt like making an effort.

It was a short dose… to help me breathe. So I came down fast and hard.

Still.

It started as a good day.

Then I got my liver results.

Which should have made me happy cause - no cancer.

And even better news. Minimal scarring. And even better. Non alcoholic fatty liver syndrome.

So I didn’t ruin my health with that glass of wine. 

But then something else happened. 

I got really, really angry.

Like ugly cry angry.

And I didn’t even want to cry. And I felt so stupid. 

So what then? I asked. 

I just hit the jackpot of weird system failures. It’s not my fault, but deal with it anyway???

But before I could actually utter these words…

He hugged me.  

He said I hate this. All of it…

and none of it’s your fault. You are doing everything right. 

There is absolutely no reason for you to have metabolic disorder. I can’t explain it and I don’t want to cop out and say it’s hereditary cause it still doesn’t make sense.  

I just hate it he said.  

And then he said something else. 

But it’s going to be okay. We’re going to figure it out. 

And to date… he has cared more and done more for me in finding answers than anyone else on this health care journey. He doesn’t owe me any of this. He is treating breast cancer. Most of this comes from when I was nine. He doesn’t always have the answer, but he never leaves me out in the dark.

It’s going to be okay.

Ugly mascara and all.

ps. If I know anyone in the makeup industry can we work on this concept? Ugly Mascara. I’m not just talking waterproof. I’m talking soul mascara… that gift you want to give someone for the day that cry comes. Cause it will come…. but it’s all going to be okay.