3:33 AM
/Tones like a
cat. a. lyst.
Such hmmnns
The way it
wavers
Like its
Transcending
impending
sounds
As It
listens
And it breathes
With its
hmmm
And
Sighs
As it
Imprints ... this
Story like
hmmm
With its
Passage
And it’s
Unfolding like
Ahhh
I am on day 3 of 4 days of steroids post this chemotherapy round. This does not seem like a very significant experience… unless you are very sensitive to the effects of steroids, which I am.
Fortunately, I am on half the dose I received last session… so while I am awake and able to write a poem at 3:33 - I am not feeling the need to crawl out of my skin.
I am still relaxed, still able to breathe, still able to create. All for which, I feel heartfelt gratitude.
While I feel very hopeful for the lesser dose, I have to keep mindful, present, and mostly PRAYERFUL that I stay in the moment and with the experience.
When I allow the Holy Spirit to be my guide, I feel peace. I feel the love, the prayers, and the positive thoughts from everyone in my life… as it channels into my soul, as a source of strength and inspiration.
I am strong. I am a warrior. But not because I try to be. It’s an acceptance in my heart. It’s a lesson from my parents. A lesson I didn’t always appreciate or even welcome.
Patience.
Patience with myself is like my experience of God in poetry. And maybe that is my call for writing. It is a sacred patience and quietude in my heart.
4:03 am
Amen.