Blind Faith...

I’ve always considered myself faithful. Not perfect by any means… but certainly faithful.

Like in my head… I’m standing on a cliff, my eyes pressed closed and I am going to leap from this gorgeous mountain into the depths of God’s purpose for me.

AND THEN…

I JUST WAIT.

And nothing seems to happen.

And then I wonder why God isn’t recognizing my surrender to Him.

And like an ocean pouring itself before me today… NO.

Cause I think I thought blind faith was asking God for a sneak peak of that jump. Let me just see what’s ahead… then I’m gonna jump for sure.

I tried something new.

I asked God to see myself through His eyes… and maybe that’s why the awareness came.

Because suddenly I saw a scared child. Not on a cliff… but with toes in a few inches of water… with a life jacket and eyes wide open.

And so then I asked another question.

WHY AM I TRYING SO HARD?

I could feel all my spiritual angst in a way I’ve never felt it before.

I pray for strength and then I resist it. I’m given purpose and then I doubt it. I’m trusted with gifts and then I hide them.

I shiver in fear at the edge of nothing when I am promised a leap of faith into everything.

I believe in peace. I do. Sometimes I even feel it.

NOT SEEING… I feel like I can breathe now. That’s the surrender.

That’s the exhale. That’s the movement. THAT IS THE CALL TO PURPOSE.

THAT IS THE OBEDIENCE TO THE CALL.

Peace does begin within. It is THE WAY. But you cannot will it… or find it. Or create it.

It’s in the HOLY BLIND TERRITORY of darkness.

God meets us in the dark, He transforms us but not while we’re wearing our floaties.

And when you trust God in the dark,,, He OPENS YOUR EYES…

And what He creates… you TRUST.

IT IS YOUR CALL …. IT IS YOUR PURPOSE. HE IS CALLING YOU…

We may not know the hour but we also don’t know the reason. We aren’t supposed to…

I’m READY.

AMEN